Self Awareness & Mastery of Emotional Intelligence

self awareness

self awareness


The buzzword “emotional intelligence” was created by Yale researchers Salavoy and Mayer, who first published their theory in 1990.  Their research was prompted by studies that demonstrated that people with average IQ’s outperformed their higher IQ counterparts in life success terms over 70% of the time. They theorized the missing link to overall lifetime success as emotional intelligence or EQ.   

When you struggle with an addiction you, and the people who are close to you, will be on an emotional rollercoaster as you find your way to recovery. Even after you’ve stopped doing drugs, there is a wide array of emotions you will face that could potentially end in relapse. We all have strengths and weaknesses, but your level of self-awareness and how you react to your emotions directly relates to good mental health and the potential for long-term sobriety

This article will explore the idea of Emotional Intelligence and give you a better idea of how to gain mastery over self-awareness. 


What is Emotional Intelligence? 

Emotion means energy in motion. Emotional intelligence is the ability to demonstrate self-awareness on an emotional level and manage those emotions effectively.  Everyone has emotions and that is normal. No internal feeling is considered unacceptable. However, there are inappropriate ways of expressing and managing those emotions.  

Emotions tell you something about how you perceive the world, so listen to them and learn from them.  When you deny yourself the opportunity to feel them, you also deny yourself the opportunity to learn something about yourself, the accuracy of your perceptions, and the chance to improve self-awareness.



27 Different Kinds of Emotions

The psychology community once assumed that most human emotions fell into the universal umbrella categories of happy, sad, angry, surprise, fear, and disgust.  Current studies by the Greater Good Science Center report at least twenty-seven distinct emotions all intertwined and connected.

People feel frustration, disappointment, rage, embarrassment, guilt as much as they do joy, happiness, delight, expectation, and enthusiasm.  They are all OK to feel; it’s how you manage and express them that counts.    

“Managing your thoughts and feelings” does not mean suppressing them, or pretending you do not have them.  It’s about becoming accepting and comfortable with the idea that you are experiencing an emotion and it means something to you. The theory is when you bury or stuff down the ability to avoid pain, you also bury or suppress the ability to fully experience joy.  It’s about opening the door of possibility that you can fully feel an emotion and not decimate or destroy you or your relationships.  

Effective management of emotions means developing the ability to fully feel the emotion that you are experiencing, effectively express what you are feeling, and work smoothly with others towards a common goal.  It means feeling the feeling, understanding that it will pass, withstanding the impulse to bury it or move too quickly to react to it, and learning what it means to you and then doing something proactive about it. 

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Goleman identified five (5 primary) areas of emotional intelligence.

  1.     Self-Awareness
  2.     Managing Emotions
  3.     Motivating Oneself
  4.     Empathy
  5.     Social Skills


How does Mastering Emotional Intelligence Help Me With Addiction? 

Learning emotional intelligence is a critical tool in the toolbox of life skills necessary to negotiate life’s challenges. Addiction comes with a complex set of emotions that people may have a hard time empathizing with. How you handle these emotions while you’re active on the road to recovery will affect who’s in your life when the smoke clears and relates directly to how difficult of a time you will have managing your recovery.

The goal is to align your vision of your life values with your behaviors and act accordingly.  Self-leadership and mastery start with identifying your core values and designing a life built on them. Mastering emotional intelligence has a ripple effect that benefits you and the people who surround you.  It’s not easy, but it’s worth it. External self-awareness is the ability to weather the storm of life and negotiate rough waters without sinking your life’s ship; not avoiding rough waters, but sailing through them to sunnier and smoother shores.


It’s Not All About You

Disappointed?  It’s ok!  In some ways, life is a solo journey, but it’s a lot more pleasurable when you have the support and camaraderie of others along the way.  Human interaction means bumping up against the rough edges of others sometimes, and emotional intelligence is one of the best GPS systems for a worthwhile trip through life.

Many people consider addiction to be a selfish disease because while you’re active in addiction nobody will ever come before your drug use. A lot of lying and manipulation is involved to try to manage this lifestyle along with having relationships with people who care about you, but this causes many relationships to go up in flames. Human beings are social beings, and we benefit and thrive best when we exist cooperatively and meaningfully within our chosen social circles.  Becoming emotionally intelligent and self-mastered requires mastery of two kinds. 

There are two components to emotional intelligence.  The first is developing mastery of intrapersonal or personal competence, which is clear and aligned with the emotional self. The second component is developing mastery of interpersonal or social competence, and that is how you interact with the world. When you authentically align your emotions with how you interact with the world, your world changes accordingly. 


Empathetic Leadership

Empathetic Leadership is recognizing what you are feeling when you are feeling it, deciding what to do about it and when, and forging the best course that serves both you and others.  It’s about stopping to feel the twinge of emotion and exploring it a bit before it becomes a snowball of momentum that damages many things in its path. Buried emotions don’t stay buried.  The emotions surface in other ways and are constantly seeking escape routes, whether it’s an untimely hissy fit or chronic low back pain.  Buried and unprocessed emotions are not benign.

It sounds effortless, but it takes dedication and practice and a bit of a thick skin to start.   It’s never too late.  


Seeking Treatment

Anyone can learn emotional intelligence through dedication to practice to improving communication between your emotional and rational parts of the brain; it’s like a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it becomes. However, emotional mastery doesn’t come naturally, and while you’re in recovery there are many difficult and complex emotions to juggle and react to. 

Anchored Tides Recovery will provide you with a support system that will help you keep your emotions and addictions in check while you focus on your life and relationships. Call us today to talk to a coordinator and get on your path to emotional mastery. 

An In-Depth Look at Services Offered by Anchored Tides Recovery Center

services offered by Anchored Tides

services offered by Anchored Tides


Being a woman struggling with addiction is a unique experience. Most men tend to have very different conditions for addiction; while they share many similarities in addiction development and treatment needs, their experiences are often different compared to a woman’s. Lets take a look into the services offered by Anchored Tides Recovery.


Benefits of a Women-Focused Addiction Treatment Center

There are many advantages to women-only rehab centers. The unity between women who attend a women’s only rehab center during their recovery provides a chance to heal in a judgment-free environment, with more empathy and understanding. This environment can make it easier for women to build relationships and a support group they can utilize throughout their lifetime. 


Services Offered by Anchored Tides Recovery


Partial hospitalization program

Partial hospitalization programs (PHPs) are for moderate to severe substance use disorders and a need to attend more support-based programs during the day. The goal of PHP is to provide a bridge between an intensive inpatient program and outpatient treatment. A qualified staff closely monitors the patient throughout the day for various lengths of time, intending to phase out prescribed medications while enrolled in this type of program.

Partial hospitalization programs provide addiction treatment through structured, supervised activities and therapies for a specified number of hours per week. PHP is helpful for patients with co-occurring mental health disorders, those who require more intensive levels of care than outpatient treatment can offer, or those who need the motivation factor that a structured program provides in combination with onsite medical treatment. As participation in a PHP helps people overcome addiction and learn coping skills necessary to lead productive lives, PHP should not be confused with detox or inpatient treatment.

Our partial hospitalization program at Anchored Tides Recovery includes a variety of therapies, including: 

  • Individual therapy
  • Group therapy
  • Dialectical behavior therapy
  • Adventure-based therapy
  • Mindfulness & meditation
  • Trauma resiliency
  • Relapse prevention


Intensive Outpatient

An Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP) is a step down from inpatient treatment and is the highest level of care that doesn’t involve the client residing at the treatment facility. IOP’s typically consist of meetings three days a week and involve 8-12 weeks of treatment in a half-day format. Group therapy can consist of psycho-education, social skill development, coping skills, relapse prevention education, stress management, relaxation, and art/music therapy. 

IOP’s are available for adults, teens, and children facing a variety of behavioral issues. IOP focuses on drug and alcohol recovery, so the program is perfect for those who may not have the time to attend an inpatient drug and alcohol rehabilitation program full time. Participants typically attend the entire day or night Monday through Friday to receive their drug and alcohol addiction treatment.

Individual therapy may include psychodynamic, cognitive-behavioral, and brief therapies. In addition, IOP’s utilize therapy to primarily continue care for drug and alcohol addiction patients following residential treatment until they’re ready to step down to a lower level of care. 



Outpatient treatment programs are designed to provide the same services as an inpatient program while allowing clients to acclimate to treatment in a less restrictive setting. At Anchored Tides Recovery, our goal is to provide every woman with the addiction treatment she requires. Once someone has cleared any alcohol and drugs from his or her system, the next step is to keep clean. We work to identify what drove the client to addictive behaviors first and then treat the person with these triggers in mind holistically.


Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT)

DBT is a comprehensive, evidence-based treatment initially designed to treat borderline personality disorder (BPD). However, DBT is also effective for people with substance use disorders; the goal of DBT is to balance the urge to use with greater awareness and understanding of one’s situation. This balance helps people establish a healthier relationship with their emotions.

DBT for addiction typically includes the following modules: 

  • Distress Tolerance Skills 
  • Emotion Regulation Skills 
  • Mindfulness Skills
  • Interpersonal Effectiveness Skills 

All of these components are important to be able to manage distress before it becomes overwhelming. In addition, for addictive disorders, learning to tolerate distress is related to managing relapse triggers.


Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)

EMDR in addiction, called EMDR-A, integrates various therapeutic approaches for the treatment of addictive behaviors. EMDR-A is a psycho sensory approach that involves exposure to stimuli associated with the traumatic events experienced by persons who are addicted. 

EMDR is an innovative psychotherapy approach that has been shown to help survivors (individuals who have stopped using drugs) manage their negative emotions, thoughts, distressing memories, and stress-related physical experiences related to their substance use disorder. 

Unlike other methods for recovery from addiction, EMDR is proven to be highly effective. The treatment consists of EMDR therapy sessions and different approaches that will help you cope with disturbing memories and associations related to your addiction. This therapy will help you deal with the trauma surrounding your addiction so that you can live a better life without dependence on drugs. In addition, EMDR provides relief from withdrawal symptoms, cravings, and other compulsive behaviors. 


Trauma Support

The trauma support treatment in addiction recovery is a fully and widely integrated support program that addresses all of the individual needs of those with trauma and their families. 

At Anchored Tides Recovery, our trauma support treatment in addiction recovery has a specific emphasis on recognizing and developing the inner strength, power, and resilience of those with trauma. With an open, caring, safe, and confidential atmosphere, our trauma support treatment in addiction recovery provides hope for healing. We specialize in providing a nurturing environment for women that includes our natural detoxification process and providing ongoing individualized therapy as needed to facilitate lasting sobriety.


Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is an evidence-based practice used to treat addiction and behavioral change. It seeks to help people with substance abuse problems become aware of and change destructive thinking and behavior and facilitate lasting change in their lives. The goals of CBT are to identify and solve the problems of maintaining substance abuse, increase self-control capacity, modify destructive patterns of thinking, reduce stress and anxiety levels, and increase satisfaction with sober living.

For those with co-occurring mental illness, CBT can help address feelings of guilt and shame, family matters, and other behaviors related to co-occurring addiction and mental illness. CBT can be taught, learned, and practiced just like any other skill or habit change. It involves identifying connections between actions, thoughts, feelings and urges. By learning how addiction works, it allows people to view their addiction more objectively. It has been proven to help addicts achieve sobriety.


Therapeutic Group Therapy

Therapeutic Group Therapy in addiction is an innovative and effective substance abuse treatment program that focuses on group interaction. This approach uses group processes as a method for understanding the nature of addiction, teaching communication and social skill development, teaching behavioral skills, increasing self-awareness, and improving self-esteem. It has a wide range of therapeutic benefits, including but not limited to decreasing tension, anxiety, and depression while increasing family and community support. 

The use of groups in this form of treatment allows for sharing experiences from those with similar backgrounds, building camaraderie among peers, and developing realistic plans for change within the drug recovery group. Like in alcohol and other drug treatment, group therapy for addictions, substance abuse treatments, or even food and eating disorders can be very effective. 


Psychoeducational Group Therapy

Psychoeducational group therapy in addiction is one of the services offered by Anchored Tides Recovery that involves mixing clients with similar issues and other individuals who have been on the road to recovery and are now helping others. A professional therapist will be present as a facilitator of the group discussion and leading the members through a series of steps. The aim is to improve the quality of life of those affected by substance abuse by bringing hope, motivation, and practical support for dealing with these issues.

Psychoeducational group therapy in addiction is based on the idea that a group can provide support, education, and other meaningful help to others who share a common problem. It brings people together to work on specific topics, share experiences, and work toward the goals of everyone in the group. The benefits of this type of therapy are numerous. For many people, simply being part of a group is enough to be helpful. Many studies show that psychoeducational group therapy works well for many issues, including drug and alcohol addiction.


Adventure Therapy

Adventure Therapy is a non-traditional healing therapy for those with addictive behaviors. It is a type of experiential therapy where some sessions involve a physical challenge, often an outdoor activity. This adventure-based approach has been used in addiction treatment to help give participants a sense of accomplishment and purpose when they have accomplished something, such as completing their first run/bike/swim/hike. This helps build self-confidence that one can lose from living with addiction/substance use and other mental health issues.

Adventure therapy is becoming an increasingly popular treatment approach to addiction. This type of treatment aims to help people discover their potentials and strengths through physical challenges in the wilderness.


Family Therapy Program

Family may represent the core of the person’s life; addiction can have a devastating effect on the family structure. A great deal of care and support is required to get a person out of an addiction.  Therapy for both the client and his or her family will be necessary so that everyone can live more harmoniously. Without the family and efforts to improve, there would be very high relapse rates, so it is beneficial to get family members involved.

As a result of family therapy sessions, a person learns to reshape his or her life with professional support and family support. In addition, recovery from addiction is much easier when all family members become involved in the process.


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Choosing a Woman-Only Addiction Treatment Center

The services offered by Anchored Tides Recovery give women the privacy and support they need to overcome their obstacles, declare victory over their addictions, and move forward with their lives. Led by a strong circle of positive women role models, these treatment centers focus on teaching women how to live drug-free and lead a healthy lifestyle in a safe environment. As a result, women that choose addiction treatment centers can let go of past issues – without fear of judgment – making it easier for them to find help. 

Addiction During Pregnancy and Inpatient Rehab for Women

inpatient rehab for women

inpatient rehab for women


Until the late 1990s, all clinical studies on addiction were only done on men; no consideration was given to the differences between gender or how drugs may affect men and women differently. Advanced research in recent years shows that the consequences of addiction are far worse in women, especially women who are pregnant and the developing child. As a result of this advanced research, we were able to develop more effective treatment options, such as inpatient rehab for women only, to develop the field of addiction further. 


Drug Use During Pregnancy

While pregnant, the fetus inside of you shares your resources. Everything you put into your bloodstream gets absorbed by the child, including toxic chemicals. Smoking, drinking, or using drugs during pregnancy may all have a significant impact on the development of the fetus. 

Research indicates that pregnant women’s usage of cigarettes, alcohol, or illegal drugs or abuse of prescription drugs may have serious health effects for infants. Certain drugs quickly move through the placenta (an organ that joins the mother and fetus) because the fetus is often reached by any drug that a pregnant woman takes. The latest research indicates that smoking cigarettes or marijuana, taking prescription pain relievers, or using illicit substances during pregnancy are associated with double or even triple the risk of stillbirth. 

More than 50% of pregnant women, for example, take prescription or non-prescription drugs or use social drugs such as cigarettes and alcohol or illegal drugs during pregnancy at some stage, and drug use during pregnancy is growing gradually as well.

Unless instructed, women should generally not use medications during pregnancy because many can affect the unborn baby. About 2 to 3 percent of all congenital disabilities are induced by medications used to relieve a disorder or symptom. Here are reasons why you should definitely opt for inpatient rehab for women if you can’t stop taking drugs.


Risks of Stillbirth from Substance Use in Pregnancy


Tobacco Use: 

The risk of stillbirth is 1.8 to 2.8 times higher, with the highest risk occurring in the heaviest smokers


Marijuana Use:

2.3 times higher risk for stillbirth


Evidence of Any Stimulant, Marijuana, or Prescription Pain Reliever Use:
The chance of stillbirth is 2.2 times greater


Passive Exposure to Tobacco:

The chance of stillbirth is 2.1 times greater


Addiction During Pregnancy

Addiction is nothing to be ashamed of; it is a chronic condition affecting millions of Americans, including pregnant women. Research reveals that over 17 million people are dealing with alcohol abuse, and over 25 million adults are abusing prescription and illicit medications.

If you have a physical dependence on a drug, your child will be born addicted to that drug. Except once they separate from your umbilical cord, they will no longer have that substance in their bloodstream and will experience potentially life-threatening withdrawal symptoms. 

Drug withdrawal symptoms in newborns can develop immediately or up to 14 days after birth and may include:

  • Blotchy skin coloring
  • Diarrhea
  • Excessive or high-pitched crying
  • Abnormal sucking reflex
  • Fever
  • Hyperactive reflexes
  • Increased muscle tone
  • Irritability
  • Poor feeding
  • Rapid breathing
  • Seizures
  • Sleep problems
  • Slow weight gain
  • Stuffy nose and sneezing
  • Sweating
  • Trembling
  • Vomiting

inpatient rehab for women

Effects of using some drugs could be long-term and possibly fatal to the baby

  • Birth defects
  • Low birth weight
  • Premature birth
  • Small head circumference
  • Sudden infant death syndrome


Nobody plans to become addicted to drugs or alcohol. However, you can opt to seek help, and you’re not going to be alone: substance treatment intake statistics indicate that about 5 percent of women are pregnant when they reach rehab. If you have become pregnant when addicted to drugs or alcohol, several supportive recovery facilities and inpatient rehab for women are trained and ready to support you through this challenging situation. Do not let your fear of being judged put your baby’s life at risk.

Women-only rehab provides a supportive place for pregnant women to get the medical care they need for drug and alcohol addiction; It gives you and your baby the best possible opportunity for a safe pregnancy and childbirth.


Choosing a Women Only Rehab

Addiction can be a daunting matter to manage during pregnancy. Emotions are elevated, and the added tension or feelings that come with pregnancy may feel like too much to handle. The longer you wait to get treatment, the greater the risk of complications during your pregnancy. 

Seeking immediate treatment eliminates the risk of birth defects and gives your child a chance at a better life for themselves and a mother’s gift of recovery.

Anchored Tides Recovery is a comprehensive dual-diagnosis enhanced Huntington Beach rehab program designed specifically for women by women. We can help you find the resources you need to manage addiction and pregnancy and provide the aftercare you need to beat your addiction. Call us today.